This was the first vocal track I recorded after coming back from a month in Israel in spring of this year
It's about how common it is to help others and love others, but how difficult it is to help yourself and love yourself.
I recorded the vocals right after re-setting up my vocal booth as I had moved out of my apartment to a house, but that didn't work out, so I had to move all my stuff back to my apartmenet, having sub-let it for about 3 months, which was itself a nightmare.
But ultimately the relationship I was in at the house was toxic, I was constantly being undervalued for my contributions to the house, including taking the attic from being just rafters to literally it being almost entirely semi-finished up there. I was berated and scolded for any contributions I made, and what ended up happening was I was exploited for my labor and the ex of mine that owns the house literally has a six figure salary and I live below the poverty line.
So that exploitation - having allowed it to go on for so long, that is - was partly on me because I didn't love or value myself enough. It made it easy for someone else to also devalue me and treat me in that way. So it was the catharsis of exiting that toxicity that precipitated me writing the song. The vocals were adlibbed.
For the overall tone of both that track as well as the three instrumental tracks on the same EP as it, I was going for Sci-Fi/Horror John Carpenter or Wes Craven or like Candyman (so like Philip Glass mixed with Bach kinda stuff).